The Full Moon was nothing to write home about. Just
imagine 10,000 Israelis, Aussies, and Brits... getting
wasted out of their gourd, wrecking havoc on this
quiet little town. It was pretty much a huge rave
with no vibe. Our entire beach got stuck because of
bad weather, so will missed most of the party.

I have finally moved on from Hat Tien. Haad Yao is my
new home for the next few days. I have been
traveling with six friends that I met over the last
month. After 3 weeks on this little island, I can
finally say that I am clearheaded and de-programmed
from the Western World. I feel like a renaissance
man. Instead of Working for someone else.. I am
working on myself. You know, "personal growth". My
latest hobbies are fire-dancing, learning German, sand
castle building, food critic, hammocking, swimming,
volleyball, sunset watching,jungle trekking, shopping
at "local markets" and last but certainly not least,
scuba diving. Yes. I got my PADI. The visibility
was terrible in Koh Tao, so I took my course right on
the beach in Haad Yao and finished my open water dives
at Sail Rock, an amazing Lava tube covered in soft
coral. In one word, Breath taking. Eels, sea Urchins,
barracudas. All of the good stuff.

I leaving in 3 days for Bangkok. Does anyone have a
good, Tailor there? Richard, Bill, Chris?
Then I am off to see everyone's favorite guy in the
East, Narc Reyes!

Until then, this is Deon Abruzzo Signing out!

Chat with Deon Tonight Thursday Fed 7th at 8:00 pm
Pac. Just Log on to AOL instant Messenger, send a
message to : swingtwins
I will then add you into the Chat.
If you don't have Lycos IM or AOL IM, get it here:
http://www.aim.com

top

I know, I know, I know it has been a while since my
last newsletter. I have received numerous death
threats from you people to write the next issue. Your
wish is granted!

Fasten your seat-belts boys and girls this issue is
action packed! It all started one day in Ubud,
Bali...
(the Clouds part like the opening scene from the
Simpsons) Since we saw our Hero Last...
The first two weeks in Bali were a bit on the calm
side.. Dead calm. I had just finished heaps of work
that I have been doing on My aunt Sande's company,
EarthVillageArt.com (the site will be up soon, when
all of the sudden... I get an email from Caroline and
Angela Partridge. I met these two incredible sisters
in Koh Phangan, Thailand. They are on some of the
same route that I am, and we had such a blast on the
beaches of Haad Yao.. we decided to meet up again in
Bali. So I rented a car and the three of us began a
three week journey...
If you have never driven in a third world country, I
would recommend it only if you have had extensive
NASCAR racing experience. Now, I am a maniac on the
road anyway, so I fit right in. A friend, Andy, had
recommended the beaches of Amed, so that's where we
went. Driving on the left side of the road is down
right wrong. You Brits need to be sorted. Shifting
with your left hand is even worse... but you get the
hang of it. In Bali, there is only one road rule. The
bigger vehicle has the right of way, even when it's on
our your side of the road! Let me paint you a picture
of Bali roads. Just imagine....
A two lane road that is smaller than a single lane in
the states, 1000's and I mean 1000's! of
motor-scooters, chickens, pigs, cows, bicycles,
people, school children, Giant dump-trunks, traffic,
drainage ditches on both sides of the road, everyone
trying to pass everyone and my favorite, pot-holes
that you could fit the U.S. National Debt inside! Now
speed up to 75 MPH and you Might get the picture. We
get lost a few times, but my internal Male-GPS gets us
back on track. The Partridge Sisters gave me an
incredible compliment. They told me that I am the
only guy that they had ever known to stop and ask for
directions! The truth is, I was totally Lost! There
are no FREAKING street signs in this damn country!
With the help of the girls constantly telling me to
ask for directions we finally found our way.
We stopped for the "WORST CAESAR SALAD OF MY LIFE" in
Lovely Candidasa and continued on... Tangent: Who the
hell puts Mayo and bacon on Lettuce and calls it a
Caesar salad.
We are then pulled over by a motorcycle cop. My heart
starts pounding after hearing some stories from other
travelers. I wasn't too worried since I had my Intl.
Drivers License and hadn't broken any laws. He
proceeds to tell me that he had been chasing me for 20
km because I went straight through an intersection
without putting on my Hazard Lights. That is a 400,000
RP Fine and we will have to go to jail if we didn't
pay. Now in Bali, that is 2 months wages and nobody
uses blinkers at all! We negotiated down to 150k and
he let us go. Legal extortion. Over the next 3 days
we were stopped twice more for, Now get this, "Using
the road". This is not a toll road like in the
states. It's a guy in a fake cop costume that has
spray painted a line across the street and stops only
tourists.
We finally reach Amed after a grueling 4 hour drive.
As we pull into the little town, the most incredible
red moon rises over the Island of Lombok. What a
sight! I took 80 photos... they will all be on the
net soon. Checked in, got dressed and hit the 10
building town. Only one restaurant served alcohol, so
we ate there. (But Deon, I thought you were on the
wagon? Sure I was, for about 3 weeks, then I fell off
and the wagon ran over me!)
The Manager told us to not continue down the coast
past 4 km. Some tourists were murdered by bandits
that pulled up side their car and claimed that there
was trouble with their tires. They pulled over and
were robbed. So what do we do? We get up the next
morning and drive 10km south...
It was sooo beautiful and I haaaad to take some
video..
Angela, who was in the back seat because she is a
backseat driver.. kept telling Cazzie and I to turn
around, turn around! The natives were giving us dirty
looks by this point, so I decided to flip a U turn.
We stopped quickly in a parking lot of an unfinished
hotel, grabbed some water and I took some photos with
my Shiny New $1200 camera. We got a very weird vibe
when a bunch of people were surrounding the car and
looking inside to see what we had....(scary music in
the background). I jumped in the car and drove off.
Not thinking too much of it, one guy followed us on
his motorbike. He trailed us for a while and pulled
upside the car and started yelling to us to pull over
because our tire was blown. I instantly rolled up the
window and took off like a bat out of hell. He closely
chases for 2 km, and I couldn't shake him. (Now
picture an extremely curvy 1 lane road that is 2 way.)
On the next strip of road, he pulls up next to me
again, pointing to my tire and still yelling. This
time he was using his bike to push us over. Since I
had watched quite a few car chases in my time, and I
do think in my distorted mind that I am now a James
Bond, I dropped the gear to second and slammed on the
brakes. He pulls ahead of me and I am chasing him.
It's always better to be the chaser than the chasee...
He tears up ahead and loses us. When we deemed it
safe, we pulled over and checked the tires. Nothing
wrong with them. I know what some of you are
thinking. I was in a 4 wheel drive and this guy was
on a motor-scooter... But it was sketchy. 20 mins
later, it happened again with a mean looking guy on a
Harley. We packed our bags and blew out of town.
What an adventure.
When we finally returned to Ubud, there was another
Hindu ceremony in Arys and Made's Neighborhood. My
Bali family dressed the three of us up in traditional
Hindu Ceremonial attire. Again. I will email the
photos when I get to Auz. I only have 2,500 so far,
but I will have more soon. As a part of the Ceremony,
the men gather for a day of cock fighting too. I know
what you are saying. "It's cruel!" and "How can you
watch that??"... The way that I look at it, it's
their tradition, and it's like peering into the past.
Trust me when I say this.. "I will NEVER see it
again!"

Quick Notes: I have a new job. I met a top DJ from
London, who is traveling on my same route. He plays
wicked funky house, house and trance. Nackered Nick
Madge. He has hired me as his manager. We are
booking gigs all over Auz. If you have an
connections... Star, Johnny or any one else, please
let me know.
THIS JUST IN: HAIR RAISING NEWS DEON IS NO LONGER
BALD!
I am Italian and my hair grows, much faster than your
Kevin! The first 3 days I looked like a walking
sperm. After a week, a giant fuzzy white peach. After
2 weeks, a reject from Army Bootcamp and after 4
weeks, I just look like a Brit. Back to my sexy self.
It was a good experience. I thought that I had "A Big
Head", but it was just my ego pushing up my hair.

In other news: I went to the Gilli Islands near
Lombok. They were spectacular. White sands, tons of
fun. I went scuba diving with sea turtles, octopus,
giant squid, cuddle fish, sea snakes and reef sharks.
I thought that ridding in the back of tuk tuks in
Bangkok was exciting. Sharks are better.
I also learned that there is a tiny country in the
British Isles called the Isle of Man. Go figure? At
least the natives are nice folk.

What else? What else? Well boys and girls I think
that's all for this weeks addition. I am in Brunei
right now, in transit to Auz. Heading for
Brisbane/Byron Bay, Darwin, Caines (Whit Sunday Island
Dive boat FOR MY BIRTHDAY on MARCH 27TH!! HINT HINT),
Fraser Island, Great Keppel Island and then off to New
Zealand... Gosh my life sucks....

I am expecting an e-birthday card or a voice-mail from
all 534 of you!! AND THAT MEANS YOU.

Last of all, I wanted to Congratulate My dear Friends
Iliana Martinez and John Grein, for their decision to
get married and travel around the world! I hope to
see you guys soon!

CORRECTION FROM WOLRD TRAVELER V: Star is one of my
top emailers! and Mozzies is spelt with z's not s's.
Thanks Blocky!

This is not good-bye, only until next time!
Deon Abruzzo World Traveler OUT!

Hello Blokes and Birds!
Yes i made it down-under unscathed... but I didn't
stay that way...
I haven't slept in bunk-beds since I was in summer
camp '86. What's really too it? You climb the ladder
crawl into bed and go to sleep. Sounds simple enough..
Unless you drink 3 pitchers of Victoria Bitter and in
the middle of the night you accidentally forget that
you are sleeping on the top bunk and you
reeeeeeeeeally "have to go". In a drunken stupor, you
get out of bed and fall 5 feet to land on you face. It
took me 3 days to get the carpet fiber imprints off of
my face. Kids. Don't try this at home.
Since then, I have broken my big toe and middle toe
nails, banged my head 3 times, cut my foot open,
slipped down some stairs and bruised the bottom of my
foot.
That's nothing compared to my adrenaline fill addenda
over the next 4 weeks. Check it out:
3 day dive boat on the great barrier reef (10 dives)
5 bungee jumps and this death swing thing in 1 day
6 days of shark diving, incl. shark cage and open
water with 4 bull sharks during a feeding (25 dives)
3 days on a Racing Sailboat to the Whitsunday Islands
(5 dives)
Go-cart racing at 75 km/h. Done! Amazing!
4 days on Fraser island camping with man eating Dingos
(only man eating if you are stupid enough to pass out
drunk on the beach)
Sky-dive from 14,000 ft, 60 sec of free-fall
and much, much more...
You could say that I am having fun. Don't worry. I
have insurance. I wonder if I am covered under shark
feedings? Mom, could you check on that?

MAILBAG: WHO WANTS A POST CARD????
Here is what you have to do. E-mail me your freaking
address by end of Day Friday. I am going to be on a
dive boat for 6 days and I will have nothing better to
do that write YOU a postcard! So start typing!

This place is truly amazing. The sun is shinning at a
beautiful 95 degrees. Everyone is sooo friendly and
helpful. And all of the old people are still dressing
like the TV show Dallas, except they wear the Aussie
version of a cowboy hat. Think Crocodile Dundee. I had
to buy all new cloths, because I looked funny in my
baggy Thai Fisherman pants. So I set off to go
shopping and didn't find too much, except one real
treasure. In a small 2nd hand store I found... now are
you sitting down?... a powder-blue, 1960's polyester,
short-sleeved, Australian Tuxedo. It was 4 sizes too
big, so I paid more to have it altered than on the
tux. I wore it 3 times, but all I got were funny
looks. I have shipped it back home. You Californians
will appreciate it. All of the guys here in Cairns
only wear Billabong T-shirts. Nick, my Welsh buddy I
met in Bali, and I are really feeling out of style, so
we are going to buy matching ones. Turquoise I think.

Today we are going to talk about foreign Language.
Ever since I left on this trip, the people I have the
most trouble communicating with are the English and
the Aussies. Yes, you would think that we all speak
the same tongue, but it's not true. I speak American,
the Brits speak English (though the Welsh speak
English with a god awful accent.. and by the way Never
under any circumstances call the Irish, Welsh or Scots
"English". They don't care for being called English.
Just a word of advice.) and the Aussies speak
Australian, just like the Fosters commercials.
I will be sitting there in a pub or a restaurant or
just asking directions and all I hear is blah blah
blah.
Here are a few vocabulary words that every traveler
should know. See if you can match the correct words
and phrases! (ANSWERS AT THE BOTTOM)
1)Take the piss
2)Toss-pot
3)Pissed
4)Wanker
5)Blokes
6)Shag
7)Choc-a-block
8)Glad rags
9)Sheila
10)Snog
11)Bird
12)a pot
13)Mate

A)Anyone
B)Guy
C)Girl (Eng)
D)Girl (Aus)
E)All Full
F)small glass of beer
G)to Kiss or a kiss
H)to have sex or the person you have sex with
I)to make fun of
J)someone that is a dick
K)dress cloths
L)drunk
M)someone that you don't like very much

1)I , 2)M , 3)L , 4)J , 5)B , 6)H , 7)E , 8)K , 9)D ,
10)G , 11)C , 12)A

HOW DID YOU DO?
Much better than I did at first. When I first heard
some bloke say "I was taking the piss out of this
Bird. I was bloody pissed, when all of the sudden we
were snogging. Then some wanker spilled a pot all over
my glad rags. We laughed it off and then I shagged her
rotten.

This is an amazing country. It's the first place I
have ever been to that I could say "This is where I
want to live!" Well, I wish I could write more but I
have better things to do than entertain all of you
boring people that than sit on your asses at home. I
am out seeing the world here Matey!

If you would like to sneak-peak what my world looks
like, you may be the first to view some of my photos
online. I have taken over 2,500 so far. I uploaded
them to ofoto.com. Please take a look.
All rights Reserved World Traveler Inc.

Earthvillageart.com Artwork for sale (232 Photos)
Please buy a Buddha and feed My Bali family for a
month!
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=93752867303&n=1368702025

Lombok & the Gilli Islands
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=72752867303&n=1649806338

Bali Photos (110 photos)
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=34172867303&n=1379583908

Bali Monkeys (100+)
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=41752867303&n=422497211

Cockfighting Watch at your Own Risk (44 photos)
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=41492867303&n=674807646

Deon and Friends(25 photos)
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=22492867303&n=1483488537

Animals of Bali(97 photos)
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=72492867303&n=1587439266

Flowers of Bali(40 photos)
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=43492867303&n=901870794

Full Moons over Bali and Lombok (111 photos)
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=14492867303&n=1712521402

Sunsets over Bali (39 photos)
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=34492867303&n=90057843

Hindu Ceremonies In Bali (328 photos)
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=35492867303&n=1233809054

Hindu Ceremonies II (230 photos)
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=74492867303&n=2016827134

Narc's Family in Singapore(23 photos)
http://www.ofoto.com/I.jsp?m=94492867303&n=214193820

I would also like to send a shout out to Kevin Blum,
Troy Henry, and Enrico Abruzzo for being the first
three people to join me in my travels. You should be
hearing good things from these boys.
Last of all I wanted to thank you all for the 37 B-day
Ecards I got! You guys are awesome. The other 472 of
you suck! hehehe

Until Next Time,
Deon Abruzzo World Travel Out!

World Traveler VIII: ToiletTalk, Crazy Characters and
Coincidences
by Deon Abruzzo World Traveler

It only took me three weeks to find the time to write
this edition of World Traveler. So much has happened
since we last met, that I don't know where to start.
I have all new sections and and HUGE Surprise for the
next edition.
I would also like to welcome the 67 new members since
our last edition! We are now up to 623 and growing!

Let me give you a quick summary of who, what, where
and How the heck I have been traveling...
Since you saw our hero last he has...
Hand fed Kangaroos, Emus, Cassawary birds, lizards,
pet crocodiles, deadly snakes and a very hungry,
grouchy, group of drunken campers on Fraser Island
Bungee jumped 4 times: It took me 10 mins to jump. I
thought I was screaming the whole way down, but I
never let out a peep.. till the end, when I so
eloquently said "Ohhhhhhhh Fuuuuuuuuuckkkkkk"
Dove with over 30 sharks at a time, where I was
whacked in the head 3 times with a tail or fin..
Completed my 30th dive
Bared my ass mooning people 3 times
Pierced my tongue.. it's didn't hurt a bit.. until it
swelled up to the size of an Aussie steak for 5 days.
I am all better now though
Sailed the Whitsunday Islands on the Maxi racing
sailboat, The Hammer. Wicked Fun. Except for the fact
that the water is swarming with Stinging Jellies, so
everyone had to wear Lycra Star Trek uniforms when
ever in the water. If you get stung, it's like someone
putting out a cigarette on you skin for about a
minute. Me and a Texan Marine said fuck-it and went
with out.
Camped with Dingos on the World's largest Sand Island,
Fraser Island. It's the most beautiful place I have
ever been to. 4x4'n on a giant freaking Sand dune is
more fun than any guy can handle.
Ate kangaroo, crocodile and ostrich for my birthday
dinner.. Roo is better than Cow and they're much cuter
too..
Went to a "Foam Party", if your soul need cleansing,
check out one of these wild parties.. That's all I can
say. Ok I will say one more thing... My filthy soul
is squeaky clean and I didn't even need a priest!
Read 5 books, I highly recommend that everyone read
Bill Bryson's "In a Sunburned Country" (in the US) or
"Down under" everywhere else. He takes the piss out
of the Aussies! Watch out.. he also has books about
the Yanks and the Brits. Thanks for the
recommendation Cazzie!
Learned to Surf Dude! On my first try, I got up for 1
second and Wiiiiippped OUUUUT, and nearly drowned in
the surf. Not bad for the first try.

and now I am sitting hear in a little hippy beach town
called Byron Bay. I have a week to enjoy, before I
head to the very cold New Zealand..

Mailbag (All NEW SECTION)
Last issue, I offered to send a postcard to anyone
that sent me their postal address. Holly cow! Tons
people responded! And you all are getting a card with
in the next 7 days.
These lucky people are getting one:
Franziska & Matthias, Marke Mark, Viper & Johnny,
Kevin K., Ms. Jillian Ponte, Lycos SF Reception ;O),
Ricky Cotton, Whitehouse, 1747 Greenwich crew, Church,
Mr. Parry, Mr. Eilers, Hambone, Freddy, Daddio, MaMa &
Gib, Sal & Neri, RAD, The MAd Hannan, Meg Moriarty,
Billy Sarah & Chris, Action Annie Jackson,
Meriweather, Babz and her Cabana Boy Scottie, The
Force, Mr. & Mrs. "Oh Great One", Row-Dog and her
sidekick Bart, Starleight, Mr. Flynn, Sandee and my
Bali Family, Freea, Robert & Elisa, Blocky and Tan,
Senator Elam, Fiona, The Milligans, the Warrens, Mr.
Kevin Blum, Mr. & Mrs. Fox, Last and certainly not
least Ms. Meredith Medland.
Sorry Amy Fig, you still have not sent me one email!
!@#$%^&*.. hehe
If I missed you somehow or if YOU would like your
limited edition, personal World Traveler Postcard,
Send me an email with your address and watch your
mailbox!

Crazy Characters (All NEW SECTION)
The Greatest part about traveling, is not the food
that you eat, places that you go, or even the
photographs you took of yourself in front of the giant
Pineapple. It's the people that you meet along the
way. When you are backpacking, staying in hostels,
riding 12 hour buses and yes, eating at Mc Donalds
everyone is equal. For the record, I have only eaten
at Mickey D's 5 times in the past 3 months. Top that
Ms. Bruce. People don't judge you by your house, car,
job or other material items that you have. You are
striped down to the true person that you are. Take me
for instance. I now know for sure who I am. I am a
Fucking Maniac, that derives his true enjoyment in
life from making people laugh.
I have met so many people out there that are not
afraid to let you know who they real are. In this
section, I will portray snapshots of Crazy Characters!

Dean the Milkman from Melbourne
Were you born in Melbourne and look nothing like your
father? Well you probably have my friend, Dean the
Milkman, to thank. We all have heard the joke about
how "you look like the Milkman's Child".. Well this
guy may be your father! What a maniac! Speaking of
Maniacs... Let me tell you about the next guy.. a
Pommie from Essex. For those of you that are not "In
the Know", a Pommie is just another name for a Brit.

Sammy from Essex
Samuel was on a road trip from Alice Springs (Ayer's
Rock) to Darwin with three girls in a camper-van. They
partied at Ayer's Rock for the night and in the
morning, they were still drunk and tired. One of the
girls decided to get up really early to take a few
photos of the Rock without telling anyone. Sammy and
one of the girls woke up and see girl #2 and another
lump under the covers. They take off and drive 500k
with out realizing that they left girl #3 at the rock
and had to drive straight back! Imagine you are in
the desert, with no water, in a skimpy tank-top and
shorts and you have to sit there and for 7 hours until
your friends pick you up.. if they ever do...

Crazy Sammy, But what a guy! I spent 3 days in Fraser
with him and Dean the Milkman from Melbourne and had
the time of my life! You never know who you are going
to meet and run into on this tiny Planet. And that
brings us to our next topic...

Coincidences
This is a very small planet. Oh you don't think so?
So I am in The Gilli Islands near Bali. I meet a group
of 10 English girls (it could happen!) I knew 8 of
them pretty well after the 5 days there. Nothing out
of the ordinary. Everyone left in their separate
directions, including My buddy Nick and I splitting up
for 2 weeks and meeting back up in Cairns, Aus. Nick
gets to the extremely remote town of Darwin and walks
in to a Bar and there are two of the girls from the
Group, Susimoo & Candice. Wow! Slightly weird.. The
next night, I fly into Cairns and go have a drink with
a Yank that I met on the plane. Right before we walk
in, I get a weird feeling and I say to him "With in 20
minutes, I will see someone I know from a far off
place." He sez.. "Yeah right." Of course in 20 mins,
I look across the bar and there are the very same two
girls! Kinda spooky.. yes it does get better..
So a month later, I am on a boat in the middle of the
Whitsundays with 18 strangers. On the last night, I
am talking to two lovely Gals, Laura & Kate. Laura
had mentioned that she had just been to Thailand,
Singapore, Bali, then Aus. That's weird, I had the
same route. We realized that we were on Koh Phangan,
Thai at the same time and Bali too.. A few drinks
later, we realized that we both arrived in the Gillis
on 3/16. Her eyes lit up and she said "You're
George's Deon from Gilli" (George is a friend that I
met there.) "The one and only baby.." Laura and Kate
were the 2 girls that I never really formally met.
The Night we all traveled back to Bali, met at at
Paddy's Bar and I posed for a photo with all ten
girls. They were in it.. It gets weirder. Last
night, I run into the same two girls from Cairns. So
we have a drink. While we are having a drink, we see
another one of the 10 girls randomly in the bar. Now
this has to be a weirdest coincidence or these
freaking 10 girls are following me. Probably the
later.

Let move into something a bit lighter shall we.

ToiletTalk: "Battle of the Bathrooms" Aus vs the World

Remember back to World Traveler II, when I was talking
about about Thai Squat Toilets? Sure you do...
Well since then, I have not really been "moved" in
regards to my favorite room in the house, The
Bathroom. Well I have had "movements".. Hell man!
It's been 2 months and that is not why my skin is soo
brown!
I have come to the belief that Aussies didn't invent
the Bathroom, but they have improved on it.

Three Reasons why Aussies Own the Throne
1) Cleaner! With the exception of some hostel
bathrooms, They rule the clean Can! Singapore didn't
even place in this category. The Sing men have such a
problem keeping their urine off the floor, that they
put signs over every urinal and created a Law, (a
freaking law!) against pissing on the floor!
Now Aussies on the other-hand reinvented the Urinal.
They drink so much beer, that they had too! In every
bathroom, they pick the longest wall and install a
stainless-steal group urinal, that continues to the
floor and under your feet. You stand on a grate, so
that, (girls! skip to the next point),when You
"shake-it", piss goes down the drain and not on the
floor. There is also a drain on every floor, so the
cleaner can just hose down the room!
2) Showers: You have not showered, till you have an
Aussie Shower. 3 points to make here. Water clean
enough to drink, pressure that will knock you down and
tear off a few layers of skin and they never run out
of hot water!!!!
3) Toilets: Oh yes, they look just like the American
Standard Brand Toilet (Mine and Al Bundy's personal
favorite), but they are smart toilets. In the states
we have smart bombs, smart drinks, we even have a few
smart people, but we have dumb toilets. In the
states, no matter what you "Do" in the can, you flush
with the same amount of water. Sometimes 2 flushes,
Johnny. But the Aussie Toilet has two flushes. 1/2
flush for a #1 and a super-duper Full Flush for a #2.
The true Aussie Bathroom Motto, "Don't waste water,
Drink beer instead!".

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT
In England, when telling time, instead of saying it's
10:30 or half past ten, they say it's half ten. HALF
TEN?? that would mean that it's only 5:00! Those
Pommies never cease to amaze me. And they tell ME
that I can't speak English

YOUR HEARD IT HEAR Funny quotes from the road. (All
NEW SECTION)

Anonymous Aussie
"We didn't steal this continent, we enhanced it!"

Israeli traveler listen me talk to Dean the Milkman
"We haven't Milkmen in Israel."

Well that's all for now. Can each of you 623 members
email My friend Viper and tell him to finish my new
website! His email is viper@wired.com

Until Next Time this is...
Deon Abruzzo Professional World Traveler

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